Breaking the power of seduction

Seduction can be seen everywhere ranging from religion, advertisement, marketing world to nook and cranny of the society. If you look logically, examine closely enough you can identify it and avoid being a victim of seduction. If you don’t know how to evaluate the situation most of the time you can lose your money, time, resources, marriages, life, even your soul to seduction. Out of ignorance and carelessness you can become the victim of seduction. Seduction is a process. Some people will identify with it being referred to as a spirit.
Let me quickly define seduction and the seducer in this context that can be more encompassing. In this context, seduction is any situation, anything, anyone, whose appearance, whose words, who by being around, who on encounter, through contact with you makes you feel magnetized. The hold that person or situation have on you may not necessarily be harmful at first but down the line you seem to be losing something. It could be something intangible as your freedom. It could be something more than physical (Odunuga, 2009). The Encarta Dictionary defined Seduction this way. “Seduction something that tempts, persuades, or attracts,” “leading astray of somebody.” “The act of persuading somebody to have sex, especially by using a romantic or deceptive approach”

Seduction can be so strong, appealing and teasing that it makes you feel powerless. Sometimes you just seem to be losing your whole sense of control. It’s like you are unable to control the situation. The power to be in charge seems to be gone. The key to breaking the power of seduction is breaking that magnetism that exists between you and the person or object in the situation. If you want to break free that magnetic field between you and the seducer must be intercepted. That force that is holding you down must be broken. There is a “how to” everything in life. Seduction is like taking up an iron filling or a metallic object with a piece of magnet. The only thing that can free up the iron filling or metallic object is another stronger magnet or force.

It must be noted that an object can seduce. In such situation, someone placed the object in a strategic location in form of advert in order to seduce, attract and appeal to you. For instance the tendencies to steal something, the temptation to buy something, the pressure to grab someone, the feeling to take hold of someone or something; all involve the same thing called a seductive force. When you feel like snatching something or you sense that someone is irresistible for you. Your judgement can be cloudy if you are not aware of all these information. It is easy to rationalize seduction. You will never realize the power you have over seduction if you keep rationalizing it. I understand that seduction and the seducer can be very strong. Your eyes are the first gate that must be shut at the seducer. Rule number one is eyes closed! Rule number two is ear closed! Rule number three is mouth shut! The next is to speak to all other senses to dissociate. You are free when you refuse to engage your entire self in the process.

Who are seducers?
When you first saw the title of this writing I am sure that the first kind of people that readily came to your mind as seducer is a harlot/ prostitute, or a striper? Seducers are more than that. Some sales people seduce you into buying products you don’t want or need. Some investors lure you by offering you a fat money loan with the intent of taking over your business once your idea gets into implementation phase because their share in your business will eventually eliminate you. Some multilevel marketers seduce you into joining their down line, so that they can climb higher on the sales ladder and become a strong up line that generates more points and money. Some sales people just try to sell you any product (sometimes it could be so funny that they have not used that product themselves). Sometimes, some Jehovah witnesses keep reappearing on your doorstep just to sell you another gospel. Some telemarketers keep phoning your home just to convince you of their service. Some websites’ hosts keep sending you spam mails that make your junk mailbox full. If you don’t unsubscribe you keep getting the same thing forever. And the key in seduction which the seducers understand better than you is that persistence wears down any man.

So how do I break seduction? - Good question. Try to do the following:
• Don’t keep in touch
• Don’t return the seducer’s call
• Don’t go back to revisit the seducer
• Avoid where you felt seduced.
• Reduce contact with the seducer
• Break communication deliberately with the seducer.
• Withdraw concentration from the seducer.
• Explain to the person that you cannot, you don’t want to.
• Be sincere, be straight forward that you don’t want to be a part of this. When you lie, you will have to lie again. You need more lie to cover pre-existing lies in order to convince the seducer. When you are blunt, the message will cut through like a sword and you will be freed.
• Give yourself to a cause bigger than you.
• Take the focus from you to other people.
• Sacrifice your idle time for other people’s good. People need help everywhere. Find a way to serve. Freely volunteer.
• Embrace purposeful living


The easiest way is to allow time before you continue relating with the person who seduces you. The temperature of passion that speeds up the process of seduction would have to cool down. Take it slowly when the other person is trying to rush you into a process. If the person is taking it slow, speed up the process disengaging. The key is to alternate the frequency between you. So the actual way to overcome seduction is to Flee! In case of a seduction from a sales person, the key is to learn to say No! In case of a seduction from a striper, the key is to leave the place. In the case of a temptation to sin, the key is to run away and then start praying from afar. I said the last thing is Prayer because the God said so! Many people try to pray before fleeing and they end up as victims. It must be noted that all the aforementioned can only help you if you are really willing to be freed from seduction. Seduction can be overcome no matter how strong it feels. If you are not tired of being a victim of seduction; you will keep ending up as victim and wondering how you got into such mess. Mess will never make you, rather it will mar you. Don’t sit back in a mess and wish it will someday turn into a message. It will require deliberate steps to come out of it and become a better person. Greatness belongs to those who can avoid being a continual victim of seduction. The truth is that in this matter, prayers actually come last. The definition of prayer here means communication. It means communicate with God. It means talk to God about it. It means confess it to God and ask for support. Ask for strength, ask for grace and help.
Seduction can be overcome even though there could be irresistibility kind of force coming from the seducer. To be seduced is a phenomenon. It is normal, it is not new. The fact is that you need to know how to handle the situation because some people seem to have stronger energy level emanating from them. Some individuals tend to have, influence, and charisma. They are stronger with overpowering spirit, sometimes they are domineering and encountering them directly or indirectly can just beat you. Things are just beyond you. So be wise!

Capture the moments…

So life went on…
Our neighbor moved,
Our friends changed.
Somebody graduated
Another friend got married,
Someone bought a home
Another friend got his dream job
Twas party time!
We went over.
We forgot our best friend’s birthday
We could not meet up with the deadline
The new Minister invited us,
He’s been forever busy.
We got a sales call
“When next can we call back?”
Never mind. We’ll call you.
Our classmate lost her loved one
She is not coming for Christmas
We were at the last reunion
She was hail and hearty
She is down with cancer.
We met this new friend
She proved to be loyal
We bonded at once
She became our family friend
We lost our car key
It fell, hidden behind the freezer
We found a parking lot closer to classroom
The Union won!
We got a raise
A staff resigned
A contract came in
Somebody invited us for dinner
An old friend will be coming for a visit
We won a bid
“The bill came in today…”
Our life revolves…
Our days spin in circle;
around events, people, places
Opportunities: they come in pieces
We live in moments
Time will never be enough
We lose; we gain and lose, to gain
We may see disappointments and frustrations
We may also be faced by rejections
When we fail, we groan
When we succeed, we smile
We hardly share the dirty secrets
We’ve loved only once. But when we love we know it.
A gossip will spread; splitting dear friends,
The cycle of life is like a circle
When we get to the place where we started.
Then we’ll begin again
But when we began, we must know the difference
Check out the sign posts,
Look for the spots and landmarks
And remember to always capture the moments
That is the secret of happiness
Because when you look back
All you can truly see are the moments...

Happy Birthday to me!-Birthday reflections.

I hardly remember people’s birthday. So, I don’t expect gifts on mine. (Laughs) don’t mind me. I laugh at my self sometimes. I hope you aren’t mad at that. Yes! Today is my birthday. And I rejoice… Come to think of it. I have been so favored. I appreciate the grace that has brought me thus far. I acknowledge that I was not smarter, better or stronger. It was the Grace of God that came to me in my lowest estate. It was because there was a good God somewhere. He is the one who sees. He saw me just like Hagar the mother of Ishmael, the maid of Sarah had recalled: “the God who sees…” God saw me where I was; there I was lying down on my back, so weak and helpless. He saw my frail body dying. He saw me-a young man, He saw one nobody, one helpless man whose heart was crying for help. When He saw the “sincerity” of my struggles and the reaction of men based on their heart that is desperately wicked; He had mercy. I was struggling and He has decided to have mercy on me. I understand that this is not fair because there are some other people who have been more diligent, faithful than me. They are doing much more. I figured that It’s not in the doing but the in His Grace. I am just a product of mercy and grace. And that is the only thing that has distinguished my life from others. My joy and boast is therefore in the Lord. In points of fact, the Lord loves me in spites of me. He chose to preserve my soul to see today…And I say thank you Lord Jesus; thank you sweet Holy Spirit. I thank you Lord God. All the glory must be to you oh my Father, my friend and my God. I just wonder where I would have been without you…probably missing, dead and lost! But lo! I was found by Grace and Truth. I’ve been rescued by Truth.
I’ve been talking about my God for some time. Do I need to introduce my own God? Because I figured that there are several kinds of gods these days. And North America and Africans can boast of million gods. My God is the God of Heaven and Earth who sent Jesus to this World to die for the sins of men over 2000 years ago…As I rolled back in my mind all that I have been through and who I have come across. I remember you who are reading these lines. You are most precious to me than anyone. Why? -Because you appreciate me and my thoughts enough to read my works. Although, I may never know you intimately; I may never have been so close to you. I may not have understood your struggles. I may no longer be a part of your life; I may have fallen from among your friends, old or new. I may have been dropped from the list of your favorite friends. I may just be your acquaintance. It doesn’t matter. I appreciate the fact that you are here.
As I clocked another year today; I have decided to take an inventory of my life. In taking stock, I realized how I have really changed over the years. Some of you can confirm this. [Laughs] Somehow, some of these changes were not good enough for some people. [Oh! Me! How I can be so weird?] Sorry, they were good for me. They were changes that have come with a price. Most of them were not without tears. Somehow, the tears were not only found in my own eyes but in the eyes of my families. Although, the power of my decisions may have brought tears to the eyes of others; they have brought more than that to mine. In retrospect, it has been worth it in all. So far, I have nothing to regret... I give God all the glory for that. Even my mistakes are becoming more of miracles in guise. I have unavoidably lost good friends. I have unexpectedly found greater friends. I have been despised, I have been tolerated but I have also been more celebrated. It’s true that families have no choice. They are destined to remain as a part of you. I have realized that your true friends will still stay with you come what may… just as Ticks fall off the cattle’s back on fields; there will be some displacement of some relationships. Success and failure have a way of redefining us. For me, that has happened and it is happening daily. Successes have a way of shrinking or enlarging our circle of friends. Those who are not meant to be in your life will leave you whether you like it or not. Hmn …it’s so sad to lose people right? -Especially if you are like me, who believe in relationships…how I love to keep my friends both old and new. Most of the times, I keep them in my heart more than they can ever imagine. I hardly forget people. Not even their simple deeds. They are all in my heart more than on my lips. Somehow, I realized that some friends love to be kept on the lips through lies and flattery. Too bad, I am not good at that.
As I flipped back in my mind to my past; I think its okay to say happy birthday to me. Whew! It’s been a very long drive here. Wait. Just before you think I am trying to feel cool with myself; I have not yet arrived. But I am glad I am on the right path. Sometimes, the joy that comes from realizing that one is pursuing a right course in itself can be as satisfying as having reached the goal indeed… I am always stretching, moving, aspiring to be better than where you saw me yesterday. I daresay that i have been shaped by my family and friends. My mum has played a very great role. My wife took over from her. And she is playing her own role already. My siblings have taught me to strive so that we can all break down the limitations together. You will never believe this: that those who dislike me most have even taught me more lessons than those who love me. They taught me humility, to rethink my actions, to be more careful with my next decisions, to be focused (perhaps they may change their mind about me), they taught me to be diligent. And above all, they have taught me to chant the lines of an animated cartoon character in Lion King- Simba- “Acuna matata”.it means don’t worry for the rest of your days…So, according to that African proverb that: it takes a whole community to raise a child indeed. Although, 31st August is my birth date; I am not freaked by it. I have never been a birthday person. It’s not in my culture to celebrate my birthdays. Rather I celebrate projects. I try to paint a beautiful artwork, write a book, shoot a video, get a manuscript published or even join some other people on their projects. Let’s push it to completion. For this year’s birthday, I have chosen to simply blog this long entry.
For me, life has been in multiples. I have been writing, speaking and studying for some time. Recently I got married. I have more responsibilities. In a way, my life has been so full of activities as usual. To me; life is like living in different multiple worlds at the same time. Words are not enough to describe them all. We are juggling several balls together at the same time. If you have been there, you will realize how it can be so funny. People exit and enter into these multiple worlds like they are moving in and out of their bed to washroom or from their bedroom to their kitchen, or living room. And then they rush to school, enter their classroom from where they end up in all kinds of rooms! It’s like travelling… I understand that we often experience the same things, issues, challenges. We all aspire to be better, to become successful, and to be significant and great. We are sometimes challenged by the same things. These provocations of our souls, these doubts, these challenges are all tools with which we are shaped for greatness. I daresay that you are going to get there if you stay on course. Therefore, don’t worry concerning the confusion, or the complexities of your life. As much as you can, try to appreciate diversity, embrace tolerance, avoid factions. Just believe in the commonality of man all over the world... we are all united, divided souls…we are united by the same mystery of death, challenged by the world poverty and the imbalance of world’s wealth distribution. We are faced by the same weather and climate depending on where you live, how you feel and what you see. We're like a unity of spirit. We are alliance of one thing. At the same time, we are somewhat different. We are all unique. We are combination of more than one soul, we all merged into one. We are more than one divided souls. We are never divided but by our interests, race, culture, environment and destinations. Nevertheless, we are connected by destiny.

Journeys of life…

Journeys are passage of time in life;
They create in us some new but old.
They take from us and give to us
they take us all through place and poles with people,
Where river over stones flow.
We roll, we flow; we stroll and cross some distance.
We break the chasms of great life barriers.
We bud in bits, in beings,
Amazing! we're different;
from whence we came from?
We grow; we glow, we gloat.
we bud like buds in buddings.
We race; we reign, and age,
We date, we dazed and we're dazed.

Entering lives and hives,
Entering hives like time,
Getting stung amidst more
We’re stung by life,
accidents leave us different
Different incidents leave us different
We meet the best, we part as friends,
we meet the best, the beasts, and the bees.
Life experience weave us a story,
Some experiences leave us so battered,
Some experiences leave us far better,
But none of all our experience leaves us the same.
Some makes us bitter,
Some makes us better
Some get us butter
we sting as Bee
Some stung as Bees

Some lead to love,
they leaves us fatter.
Some lead to lust,
they leave us fagged out.
We live in life, to own, to owe and old.
We love to hide and side
we love to live. We live to love.
We’re lost in love and love some song.
We long to love; and won for love.
We're lost in love, we long to live;
We lost from lust to love again.
Forever like Bees,
our lyrics as smokes, aflame
From hearts of aches and pains,
Our hope, for host,
They spring from hearts
Like plants we rise
We sprouts at dawn,
We weave for light and weep for People
Who come and go, with memories
They linger in all our hearts.